a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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