What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
