Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
