I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
