theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
