Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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