Do you still have your period?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize