okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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