I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
