Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize