Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
How's work?
Spinning.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Watching her eat just hurts me
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Randomize
