it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Randomize