your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
