I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
