she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Randomize