i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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