I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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