weddingsv make me drug and hornr
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
