In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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