I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Houston, we have a blender
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
