STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
