That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
