when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
