I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize