This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I just found puke in my bra..
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
