Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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