so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
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we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
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Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
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