I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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