This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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