Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
