So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
