Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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