yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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