Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize