Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
