You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We need to get me chipped asap
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
