so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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