I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
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