I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
