6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
