love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Sober January is a disaster.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
