I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
