I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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