Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Me too!
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
