He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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