My liver just broke up with me...
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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