just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
50% drunk capacity currently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize