Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
