This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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