I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
