Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
high people should be assigned attendants
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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