even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
